After editing my second draft of my documentary, I received some feedback on how to improve it even more. The first criticism was that my beginning fact was too quick, and that I needed to make it longer, so that the audience has more time to read it. I was advised to include some over-laying shots after discussing some of my shot ideas and intentions. The overlaying shots would go over a face, which would reference a photo in my blog about inspiration shots for my documentary. This overlaying would add to my creativity within my documentary, and help convey the message of identity. The majority of the feedback was centered towards my archived footage of newspapers and headlines. I had earlier discussed my intentions for my newspaper articles, however I did not have the editing tools accessible to animate the newspapers in the way that I intended. I conducted some further research and came across a Netflix TV show called 'Wormwood'. Within this Netflix show, there is a lot of creative uses of newspapers and headlines, which inspired me to illustrate my newspapers in the same way. For my third draft, I will look at some different ways of depicting these newspapers in a more engaging and creative way. The feedback I have received from my first draft to my second draft has allowed me to gradually improve my documentary, and I imagine that after my third draft, I should be complete with editing my final documentary product.
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